Filler’ Up! Eh? FILLER WHAT??
by: Mirabella Nevlómë
When we last left our Super Seigaku Regulars, they had just defeated Rokkaku Chuu in the semi-finals of the Kantou Regional Tournament and had many wacky adventures which included a billiards tournament (with the winner getting an All-You-Can-Eat-Buffet at Kawamura Sushi!), Royal Inui Juice Z, cursed rackets, damaged bicycles, flying desks, white-painted hair, never-ending BURNING mode, killer skeletons and a 7-on-1 tennis match.
This, my friends, is what we call filler. Tasty filler, but filler nonetheless. And if you’ve ever seen Naruto, then you would understand the pain that filler can be! OH FOR THE LOVE OF SASUKE!
One day after practice Taka-san tells Ryoma that the All-You-Can-Eat-Buffet voucher he won in the billiards tournament expires that day![1]* Ryoma assures Taka-san that he will use it that day, but unfortunately, both Eiji and Momo overhear and decide to tag along, since the voucher did not have limit on the number of people who could eat. In the end, all the Seigaku Regulars, along with the Ichinen Trio, and Tweedle-Dee & Tweedle-Dum tag along to mooch off of Ryoma’s voucher![2]* Tomo-chan, of course, sits next to Ryoma and encourages Sakuno to sit on the other side. However, Sakuno gets all blushy and embarrassed and decides to sit with the Ichinen Trio instead and that is why I call her Tweedle-Dum because she is dumb! *puns worthy of Davide and is kicked in the head by Bane Missa*[3]*
Anyways, during this time Momo invited his girlfriend Tachibana Ann to come over in order to hear about Fudomine’s match against Rikkai Dai Fuzoku, Seigkau’s opponent in the finals of the Kantou Tournament. Inui, the Data Master, suddenly provides a tape of the match between the two teams out of thin air and they all begin to watch the Destruction of Fudomine. And yes, in caps because It Is Just That Important, Okay?
First up we see Kamio/Shinji pair of Fudomine against Yanagi/Sanada pair of Rikkai and Rikkai wins the match six games to love. The next match seen is Fudomine’s captain Tachibana against Rikkai’s Ace Kirihara. Astoundingly, Tachibana lost six games to one because during the match he twisted his right ankle, which Kirihara ruthlessly targeted, making this match the shortest match in the Kantou Tournament of fourteen minutes and two seconds. As a result, Tachibana is hospitalized with an injured ligament. Of course, after watching the video of the match, everyone is majorly shocked, but Oishi snaps them out of their blues and pulls a Fuji by asking Taka-san to make wasabi sushi for everyone to eat. Obviously, the wasabi is supposed to represent the strength of Rikkai and by eating wasabi sushi, they will symbolically conquer Rikkai. In reality, methinks they are just asking for heartburn. *passes out antacids*
Finally, the big day arrives. The Kantou Regional Tournament Finals! Seigaku versus champion Rikkai. And it’s raining?!?!. Ah, ame-chan, you’re so cruel.[4]* Will they get to play or not? While waiting, Kirihara shows up and starts to talk trash about Tachibana and Tezuka, Seigaku‘s captain. Fuji gets serious (serious meaning Eyes-Are-Open-Run-For-Your-Life-OHNOES!) in response to the remark about Tezuka, while Ann almost attacks Kirihara for his remarks about her brother, but is held back by her other boyfriend Kamio. A long staring match ensues between Fuji and Kirihara (and this is what we call foreshadowing children) until Sanada shows up and gets the last word in saying that Seigaku will lose, with or without Tezuka, before going off to brood over Yukimura practice until the official announcement is out. OH SNAP! And with that, Ryuuzaki-sensei returns after meeting with the referees and the news is finally broken that the match between Seigaku and Rikkai will be delayed for one week because of the rain. Seigaku leaves to return to school and begin practice, but Ryoma hears the magical sounds of tennis balls slapping and goes to investigate. Upon arriving at the source of the sound, he sees none other than Sanada of Rikkai practicing his serve by hitting water drops that are falling off of leaves. Of course, Ryoma, the stud that he is, decides to do the same thing and even goes so far as to one up Sanada, by serving and knocking Sanada’s ball off course and hitting the water drop that Sanada was aiming for. Oh snap, Ryoma is actually acting his age! Sanada, stoic that he is, asks Ryoma if there was something he wanted and Ryoma was kind enough to tell Sanada that the game had been cancelled for a week, but how he cannot wait to play.
Meanwhile, back at Seigaku everyone notices Ryoma is missing, but so is Fuji! The reason Fuji skipped? Why to go visit Tachibanana Tachibana at the hospital! He even brought flowers! In Tachibana’s room, they talk about lots of things; the match being cancelled, Tachibana’s rehabilitation and Tezuka’s health. Tachibana warns of Rikkai, especially Kirihara (foreshadowing event #2), and as a parting gift, gives Fuji his favorite grip tape! Nothing says friendship like grip tape. *buys akai colored grip tape for Jess*[5]*
Fuji returns to Seigaku and everyone is still, “O HAY GUYS WHERE’S RYOMA?!?” Unbeknownst to them, Ryoma is currently facing SuperSamurai Sanada in a match. During the course of the match, to put it bluntly, Ryoma was beaten so horribly bad that he should be glad that no one saw it…but truthfully, I cannot say that is so, as Akutsu Jin was on a passing train, and spotted Ryoma on the courts below, so he got off on the next stop and ended up watching Ryoma get utterly beaten. Utterly![6]* Sanada’s speed and power are above Ryoma’s level and as a result, this match ends up throwing Ryoma into a funk because someone other than his daddy and Tezuka-buchou beat him and so he’s emo about it. It didn’t really help how at the end of the match Sanada told Ryoma that their match was better than playing against a wall. The next day at practice, Ryoma’s funk continues and he cannot focus. He eventually goes to Taka-san and requests him to hit Hadoukyuu at him repeatedly. In the end, Ryoma could not return a single one of Taka-san’s shots and had to stop when Taka-san‘s wrist gave out.
On his way home, Taka-san runs into Akutsu who was waiting for him. Akutsu tells Taka-san about Ryoma’s impromptu match against Sanada, and how Ryoma lost without scoring a single point, emphasizing Sanada’s speed, power and control over that of Ryoma’s. At this point, Taka-san realizes that Ryoma was envisioning his Hadoukyuu as if they were Sanada’s shots. Akutsu borrows Taka-san’s racket and goes off to challenge Ryoma. Akutsu calls out Ryoma on his fear of seeing Sanada in whomever he plays and takes a four game lead over Ryoma. In the end, Akutsu ends up knocking Ryoma out of his funk and gets him to start playing how he used to. Akutsu tells Ryoma, “Let the one who caused your defeat feel his own defeat. Without hesitation.” See, Akutsu’s not a bad guy after all, now is he? And yes, that was rhetorical. Da-da-da-DAN!
Continuing with the filler, since the final match between Seigaku and Rikkai was delayed for a week, Ryuuzaki decided to take the Seigaku Regulars to the countryside for a quick training camp session to prepare for the finals. At camp, it was a complete return to the basics for the Seigaku Regulars. This means that at the start of camp, all the rackets were confiscated and locked away and they started training from scratch beginning with a nice run up a mountain, through the forest and a river and ending with rock climbing, before running all the way back to their lodge! \:D/ The pure and true natural way to build up their strength and stamina.[7]* On top of that, when they got back, they got to do even MORE drills. Like, running after tennis balls and catching them with their bare hands!! OMG, can you feel the excitement?? To top it off after practice, they get to take a nice bath, with Momo and Kaidoh trying to kill each other, of course, as well as have a tasty curry dinner that is totally spiked with coffee. Because naturally, coffee is the best thing to have before going to bed. Only not.
The next morning as Ryoma, Momo and Kaidoh are returning from who knows where carrying cases of milk, and are suddenly assaulted by a mad cow and a crazy unshaven person. This crazy unshaven person you ask? Why that’s none other than the previous Seigaku hippie tennis captain, Yamato. He’s the one who started all the crazy Pillar of Seigaku talk when he was Tezuka‘s captain, so now you know who to blame. And the reason he is there? Why to be their coach for the day, duh! And what does he have them do? Why pick vegetation of course! Everyone knows the secret to winning tennis championships is to pick ferns and bamboo shoots.[8]* Ryoma, naturally, is not impressed and goes to sleep under a tree. Yamato stalks Ryoma, sees some bamboo shoots near the edge of a cliff, goes to pick them and due to a hilarious twist of fate, both end up falling over. They begin to make their way back with Yamato talking his strange hippie talk and Ryoma’s thinking "mada mada da ne" as usual because that’s what Ryoma does. They come to a river and Yamato decides to do some fishing since they’ve not eaten and blood sugar has dropped liek whoa and then suddenly everything Yamato has been saying starts making sense to Ryoma and he catches a fish and is all happy and smiling and there are SPARKLES everywhere. I could explain more, but that’s Yamato-buchou for you, and you can only understand once you watch it. Because his brilliance is more than I can summarize. And brilliant he is because he uses the fire from cooking fish to send up a smoke signal to notify the rest of Seigaku where he and Ryoma are. See, BRILLIANT!
The excitement doesn’t stop there. The next day, while the Regulars are practicing, the Ichinen Trio and Tweedle-Dee and Tweedle-Dum Tomo-chan and Sakuno are all preparing dinner. Suddenly, they are out of cabbages, so Sakuno offers to go out to the storage shed and get more. Time passes and she doesn’t come back! YAYE! So Horio goes to look for her and does not come back either. The other three are all, "LOL HAY GUYS WOT’S GOING ON?" so Kachiro and Katsuo go to look. Of course, by now you should see how this is going; they don’t come back either. By this point, Tomo-chan is ready to maim and kill, so she goes off looking for them. She gets to the shed and hears weird sounds; looking inside the window she sees a BEAR! At this point the Regulars are done with practice and want to eat, but the freshmen aren’t there. Tomo-chan enters the dining hall, spazzes out while the Regulars look on in confusion, yells there is a bear and then passes out. Can you sense the DRAMA?? So the Ichinen Trio and Sakuno are cornered in a tiny shed with a massive bear that is about to eat them; how do the Seigaku Regulars decide to handle this problem? Why with tennis moves, of course! \:D/ The freshman rescue operation begins![9]* Of course, everything ends well as the Mystery of the Storage Shed Bear is solved by Scooby and the Gang...wait, wrong show! *coughs*
Moving on, Seigaku’s time at camp is coming to an end, so what better way to go out than with a tennis biathlon? Well, there is another way, which will actually be mentioned later, but for now, the biathlon is a pretty cool way to begin. The day starts off with the usual practice matches, followed by a run up the mountain. However, on this day when they arrive at the top of the mountain peak, the Regulars are informed of a biathlon they will do right then, where at three different checkpoints, they will be tested on their power, control and speed![10]* While this is going on, Ryuuzaki and Shiba (who tagged along to report on Seigaku’s training camp) leave to complete preparations for the final training exercise later that day. As is the usual for the Seigaku Regulars, the lead throughout the course of the biathlon changed frequently, but in the end, they all crossed the finish line together, making them all WINNARS! Aww, how nice, ne? Anyways, they head back to the lodge, thankful that practice is over, only to find out it’s not! Ryuuzaki informs them that for the last part of their training menu, they will now hold practice matches against Hyotei Gakuen!
YAYE! HYOTEI! ATOBE-SAAAAAAMAAAAA!!! So, as if you couldn’t tell by now, I’m somewhat partial to Hyotei.
At this announcement, Seigaku is all, "LOLOLS, HAY THAT’S FUNNY YOU WRINKLY OLD LADY!!" since they just got done with the Tennis Biathlon of Doom, but Ryuuzaki does not joke when it comes to matters of the heart tennis. With that, the practice matches begin! After the Attack of the Frogs, that is!
The set-up for the matches is that there will be two singles matches at a time and they will be one set matches with no tie-breaks; if a game reaches six all it will be considered a tie, and Hyotei being the guests, gets first serve. To determine who plays who, sticks are drawn from a can by the Seigaku Regulars, and the sticks they draw will have the name of their opponent from Hyotei.
The first two matches we see are Inui vs. Hiyoshi and Eiji vs. Kabaji. While Inui is making small talk with Hiyoshi, Eiji’s match with Kabaji has started. At first, Eiji could not return a single ball that Kabaji hit, losing the first game. However, he quickly rebounded and using his super acrobatics, Eiji started to rebound. Of course, this being Kabaji, we all know what happens next; he begins to mimic Eiji’s moves and sayings. A quick flip to the other match shows Inui scoring a point against Hiyoshi, who was distracted by the other match. Hiyoshi tells Inui that was a dirty move, but Inui was all, "LOL HAY HOMIE WE PLAYIN’ OR WOT?!" while his glasses glint manically, before shifting back to Eiji and Kabaji. Kabaji is still copying all of Eiji’s sweet moves and sayings, and soon the physical differences between the two begin to show, especially as Kabaji is much bigger and has a greater reach! Eiji is getting all RAWRY and starts to jump around even more; some think this is reckless, but this is GENIUS on Eiji’s part because Kabaji is not used to jumping around as much as Eiji is, and soon his legs begin to give out and Eiji wins the match six game to one! With the end of that match, we bounce back over to Inui and Hiyoshi! Inui is, of course, playing his Data Tennis and muttering percentages to himself, but at the end, Hiyoshi scores the final point bringing the match to six games all and ending in a tie. As they are shaking hands at the net, Hiyoshi notices something on Inui’s wrist, which happens to be wrist weights. Hiyoshi is flabbergasted and even pulls up Inui’s jersey to reveal a twenty-five pound weight jacket underneath. Obviously, if Inui can play with a handicap like that and still tie, he is clearly made of awesome.
The next two matches are Fuji vs. Oshitari and Oishi vs. Shishido! Fuji and Oshitari are both considered tensai’s of their respective schools. They differ in the fact that Fuji relies on his talent and never plans ahead, while Oshitari is meticulous in his planning, going so far as to purposely use Fuji’s moves from Fuji’s previous match against Jirou. Even Fuji realizes that he cannot win unless he plays seriously; he finally uses one of his Triple Counters, the Higuma Otoshi. Of course, Oshitari can also use this move and challenged Fuji to a battle of the Higuma Otoshi. Meanwhile, in the other match, Shishido has an astonishing lead over Oishi of four games to love. Shishido wants to find out if Seigaku is worthy of being the Kantou representative at Nationals. Even though he is behind, Oishi is persistent in not giving up and eventually manages to catch up to Shishido to a four game tie. Shishido realizes Oishi’s perseverance and calls for the game to end there because he finally believed Oishi worthy of playing in finals and wishes him luck. In the other court, the battle between Fuji’s and Oshitari’s Higuma Otoshi rages on! Oshitari thinks Fuji is trying to take the game into a tie, but hits an Higuma Otoshi and realizes something is wrong, especially when it lands out. From there on, every Higuma Otoshi that Oshitari hits lands out. Inui is the first to realize how this is happening. By gripping the racket higher, Fuji has greatly increased his smash power to the maximum, which was helped by the strength he developed through his time at camp, which almost rivals that of Momo’s. Fuji ends up winning the match seven games to five, when his last smash broke the gut of Oshitari’s racket.[11]*
The next two matches that take place are Taka-san vs. Ohtori and Momo vs. Gakuto! Ohtori starts off the match with his Scud Serve, which has greatly improved since we last saw, and Taka-san is not able to even touch it at first. On the third serve, he catches up and is able to return the serve, but it ends up going out. Ohtori takes the first game, but Taka-san reciprocates in the second game by using his Hadoukyuu. Meanwhile, Momo has already dropped his first game to Gakuto, much to Eiji’s displeasure who is yelling out commands and telling Momo with that kind of play he cannot be Eiji’s shatei.[12]* The game goes on and when Momo uses his Dunk Smash, it is sealed by Gakuto who has improved his stamina and can catch up and return them. But back to Taka-san and Ohtori, Taka-san is thinking that Ohtori is still having problems controlling his serve, so he opens up the right side of the court to force Ohtori to make an error. However, Ohtori has worked on his serve and mastered complete control of his serve with the help of Shishido.[13]* Taka-san is surprised at first, but eventually gets used to the speed of the serve and is returning it, but is having trouble getting back for the second return. So he’s all, "WHAT THE HECK, GREATO BURNING!" and decides to start off immediately with the Dash Hadoukyuu, one-handed at that, and returns the serve directly to Ohtori’s face (but not on purpose, mind you), who thank goodness got the racket up in time and Taka-san gets the point. However, Oishi calls an end to the match, so that Taka-san won’t risk hurting himself. Flipping back to Momo and Gakuto, we see that Momo is still stubbornly using his Dunk Smash, but only because he Has A Plan! Jumping up once more, Momo hits a Dunk Smash and Gakuto is in position (ie: floating in the air upside down), but the ball won’t bounce. However, suddenly it does, going right past Gakuto’s face of extreme confusion, which is a cute look for him. Momo used his strength to delay the time of the bounce, and ends up calling that dunk the Super Great Momoshiro Special![14]* Momo ends up winning the game and when shaking hands, Gakuto asks, "By the way, what did you say when you hit it?" Momo replies, "What, the Super Great Momoshiro Special?" Oshitari off to the side hears and comments, "That’s some bad naming sense," while Shishido and Ohtori simultaneously state, "Geki desa!" which is Shishido‘s favourite saying meaning "super lame" and Shishido is all kinds of shocked that Ohtori said it too.[15]*
The final two matches of the day are Kaidoh vs. Jirou and Ryoma vs. Atobe! Ryoma’s match starts first and Atobe declines the first serve, much to the chagrin of Oishi who is very much a stickler for the rules, but Atobe states, "I am the rule!" which, of course, he is. Be awed at the sight of his prowess, yo! Before the match begins, Atobe says to Ryoma, "There’s something I want to make sure of. I’m going to see if you’re up to Tezuka’s level." Meanwhile, Kaidoh on the other hand, has started playing against a Jirou who is still not quite awake, so Kaidoh decided to wake him up with his Boomerang Snake. Jirou spazzes out appropriately, but tells Kaidoh he sees its weakness before walking away. But what is that weakness? We don’t know yet because it’s back to Ryoma and Atobe. Ryoma hits a Drive B, but Atobe, the awesome tennis beast he is, manages to return it with ease, winning that set for a two games to one lead. They have to change courts and Fuji makes a remark that, "it’s about time for it to show up," where the it in question is the Rondo Towards Destruction.[16]* Atobe finally uses the Rondo and successfully knocks Ryoma’s racket from his hand. The second time, Ryoma manages to bring his racket down and catches the ball, but the pure power of Atobe’s smash knocks the racket out of Ryoma’s hands again. And just when things are getting good, it is back to Kaidoh and Jirou’s match, where Kaidoh is down four games to one. Kaidoh is getting irritated, so Momo goes over and confronts Kaidoh as a means of calming him down. Magically, it somehow works and Kaidoh begins to return shots; when Jirou is able to return Kaidoh’s Snake with a rising shot, Kaidoh is all, "LOL FSSSHUUUU!" and hits the incredible Hadoukyuu Boomerang Snake. Jirou, of course, was expecting a regular Snake and catches the ball, but the shot is so heavy from power that it rolls up his racket and hits him in face, which causes Jirou to pass out; Kaidoh wins! Ryoma’s match with Atobe is still going on. Atobe has hit many Rondo’s and Ryoma has not been able to return one. Atobe shares a few words of wisdom stating, "If you lose to me here you won’t be able to beat Rikkaidai." Atobe ends up leading five games to one because Ryoma is not yet able to break Atobe’s Rondo. However, soon enough Ryoma is able to return the Rondo’s and even starts making a comeback, making it five games all. Atobe, using his Insight, thinks that Ryoma’s wrist is at its limit due to the continuous Rondo’s, especially as he was holding back some power when he smashed. With his last Rondo, Atobe used full power and knocked Ryoma’s racket away. Thinking that this is Ryoma’s full potential, Atobe calls for an end to the match. At the same time, everyone else is gossiping among themselves, saying that Atobe dropped the games on purpose to lengthen the match, making it a repeat of his match against Tezuka. As Atobe is walking away, Ryoma calls him saying it’s really Atobe’s wrist that is at its limit, not Ryoma’s. They continue to play and Atobe realizes that Ryoma’s wrist is not at its limit and in fact the power of the shots increased. Ryoma wins the match bringing it to a draw, six games all.
After Hyotei leaves, we see Atobe talking on the phone to Tezuka! Major shocku! Tezuka was actually the one who set up the practice matches with Hyotei! Ryuuzaki clarifies for the rest of Seigaku that Atobe was there to help train Ryoma to bring out his hidden potential by pushing his limits, not to destroy his wrist. See, never doubt Atobe-sama! *nods* And as a result of his match with Atobe, Ryoma has a fancy new smash!
With that, Seigaku’s mini training camp comes to an end and they head back home to meet Rikkai Dai in the finals of the Kantou Regional Tournament. What happens next you ask? Well, you’ll find out in the next edition of the Paw Print because this was all filler baby. No one is spared the pain of filler, no matter how tasty it may be.
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[1]* Yes, of course Ryoma won! Did you really expect anything else? I mean really now, this is called the Prince of Tennis for a reason. Ryoma = the Prince of Tennis > your mom and the family dog. Yay! See, who says math can’t be fun?
[2]* Ichinen Trio = Horio, Kachiro and Katsuo; Tweedle-Dee and Tweedle-Dum = Tomo-chan and Sakuno, respectively. *nods*
[3]* Look here for the greatness that is Davide and Bane. Also, Missa » Bane + Mira » Davide x Juice(J-Pop by p)² = Super!Awesome!Fantasticness > than your grandma. Yaye, more fun with math symbols! \:D/
[4]* Ame is Japanese for "rain" and you need to know this because you are watching a Japanese anime after all; would it kill you to know a little Japanese vocabulary? I think not. You need educating, so Mira-sensei is here to help. Yoroshiku! *bows*
[5]* Akai is Japanese for red. Why red and why for Jess? Simple. Jess less than three’s the fugitive Japanese pop star known as Akanishi Jin ( ?? ? ), whose name begins with and contains the kanji for red ( ? ). Therefore, I give her grip tape whose color shares the same kanji with the guy she less than three‘s. I am awesome, for Real Face! *is bricked*
[6]* Not to be confused with udderly, which is not really a word at all, but can refer to udders which are cow parts that provide us all with milk, GLORIOUS milk. Bring me some Oreo’s, Dobby!
[7]* Also, see Crunches with Trees, a new five minute workout guaranteed to give you abs of STEEL! Call now to order your very own tree! Operators are standing by!
[8]* Of course, this is a lie. The secret to winning tennis championships is to pick daisies and make daisy chains. Duh!
[9]* Freshman Rescue Operation sequence as follows:
- First, Momo’s Dunk Smash (which hit Horio’s forehead, knocking him out).
- Second, Inui’s Vegetable Juice (which the bear picked up from the window ledge, threw over his shoulder, landing right in Horio’s mouth, who inevitably drank it, then passed out).
- Third, Kaidoh’s Boomerang Snake (which entered a crack in the side of the house, heading straight for the bear, but hit Horio in the forehead as he was getting up after finally recovering from the toxic juice, successfully knocking him out…again).
- Fourth, Oishi’s Moon Volley (which bounced on the window ledge and headed for the bear, but the bear accidentally stepped on Horio’s leg, waking him and making him jump straight up…into the path of the ball, which hit his nose, knocking him out again).
- Fifth, Eiji’s Acrobatics (which involved him moving back and forth quickly in front of the window the bear was looking out, but Horio after finally waking saw Eiji’s moves and promptly became dizzy, passing out…again).
- Sixth, Taka-san’s BURNING POWER (which was actually the Hadoukyuu that entered the window and ricocheted throughout the shed before finally coming to a stop after smashing Horio’s nose, again).
- Seventh, Fuji’s Higuma Otoshi (which actually made it through the window and actually hit the bear on his nose causing him to ROAR really loud and do nothing because there was very little power in the shot).
- Eighth, Ryoma’s Twist Serve (which entered the window, barely missing the bear’s face, ricocheting off the wall to hit the lamp shade hanging from the ceiling which then fell on the bear’s head causing him to stumble around before crashing into the shelving on the wall, yelling "OUCH!") That’s right kidlets, the bear talks, meaning it’s not really a bear but a man in a bear suit, who was actually a robber, and was eventually taken away by the police, all in thanks to our Super Seigaku Tennis Heroes.
[10]* At the first checkpoint, the Regulars have to swing across a river on vines like Tarzan and they are then tested on their speed. A ball will be dropped by Kachiro, who is sitting up in a tree 25 meters away, and they have to run and catch it with their racket in order to pass. At the second checkpoint, they are tested on serve control, where there are many colored cans and as they are about to serve, Horio will yell out a color and they must serve and hit that colored can in order to pass. At the third checkpoint, they are tested on power, where they will wade into a river, and Katsuo will drop a ball from upstream and with a racket cover on their rackets, they will try to return the ball into a basket sitting on a rock in front of them, working against the force of the river.
[11]* Here gut is a tennis term that refers to the strings of a racket, usually made from animal intestines. That animal would most likely be a cow. So every time you eat a nice, thick hamburger or a juicy-juicy steak, feel proud that your cow may have contributed to the wonderful world of tennis. After all, it takes about three cows for every racket. Don’t you just love learning about random stuff like this? I know I do. *pets Google*
[12]* According to the translation, shatei is Yakuza slang for the term little brother. Yakuza is the Japanese Mafia, who unlike their Italian counterparts, wear really gaudy jewelry and flashy clothes. Imagining Eiji and Momo as Yakuza makes me lolerskates liek whoa.
[13]* On a dark and stormy night, Shishido calls up Ohtori and is all, "O HAY BRO LET’S GO WORK ON YOUR CRAPPY SERVE CONTROL!" and Ohtori’s like, "LOL OK!" and so they both make their way to an abandoned warehouse that happens to have a broken down wall in the middle of the room with a perfect hole in it. Shishido tells Ohtori to serve and make the ball go through the hole to practice his control. It takes him the whole night, but Ohtori finally manages to serve a ball through the hole, mastering his technique and form. Shishido shakes him in joy and congratulates him before saying, "OMG DUDE, GET ME PANCAKES IT’S TIME FOR BREAKFAST!" and Ohtori’s all, "LOL OK!"
[14]* Would you like fries with that?
[15]* Optional translation as follows:
Gakuto: "O HAY WOT DID YOU YELL OUT LIEK WHOA JUST NAO?"
Momo: "LOL WOT? SOOPER GRATEO MOMOSHIRO SPESHUL! DER~"
Oshtari: "WOT A MAROON!"
Shishido & Oshitari (together): “WOT A LAME DORKHEAD!"
Shishido: *in majoru shocku*
Ohtori: "LOL O HAY PINCH POKE YA OWE ME A COKE SHISHIDO-SAN!"
Shishido: *still in majoru shocku*
[16]* A recap just in case. The Rondo Towards Destruction is a two-step smash that Atobe-sama uses. First, he aims for the grip of the racket, hitting it to either loosen his opponent’s grip or knocking the racket away completely. Second, he smashes the returning ball again to gain the point. A play of awesome brilliance if I do say so myself.